A slightly tongue in cheek title I'll grant you but when I'm provoked... baby hang onto your hat! So this week I'd like to get people talking about "self-love". What it is, what it isn't and why I have it in droves and I'm very happy with that.
Having suffered from Depression, Eating Disorders, Bullying and Low Self-Esteem for the majority of my life thus far, there came a point when I was actually at my largest size and made the decision to have a boudoir photoshoot done for myself to prove to myself that I can be sexy and beautiful and just as model-y at any age or size as the next person. So I did it... and I LOVED it! I even did a completely nude one against the photographers advisement who was also a curvy girl. But I knew WHY I wanted them and I knew exactly WHAT i wanted. I understood why the lady was delicately trying to guide me away from such a stark, difficult to re-touch shot but I wanted to see my natural beauty for EVERYTHING I was (and am) worth.
They were (and are) perfect! I would whole-heartedly advise anyone to try a photoshoot like that. It really gives you a different perspective, a sense of achievement and an air of sexiness that just exudes from every movement.
I chose to do this at my largest size while I was a size 22 and attempting to get my eating habits to a more nutritional state of affairs - I knew what to do (I studied it for goodness sake) I just needed the effort to get my life in order. I could have happily stayed at a size 22 but my body came down to a size 18 last year and then over the last year I dropped another stone and another dress size; mainly by eating whole nutritious foods and exercising when I want to give myself a bit of energy and help with my mental health.
So it's 2018 now and I'm a size 16, with Pink Hair and a serious Penchant for Jumpsuits and Pointed Stilettos coupled with a drive that could outrun a McClaren and confidence that soars higher and higher by the week and you have a recipe for Liz McDonald making some big waves over here.
So without further ado... here are 10 things I adore about me!
1. The fact that I'm Left Handed, i've always loved the "creative side" that is associated with it, it really makes me proud when people mention it.
2. My eyes; they are slightly uneven but they are a combination of colours and I've always gotten compliments on them. I can play as modest as I like but I'm always super proud of them.
3. My Bum; I don't know whether it's because I was an Irish Dancer for so many years or because my favourite exercises have always been squats and lunges. All I know is I love the shape of it and I always get compliments on it.
4. My Calves; some people might be put off by how muscular they are but I love them. Once a person said you have dancers calves... I could have kissed them! Delighted with my legs from there on out! Not to mention the fact that them being so strong meant I could dance all night in my favourite heels.
5. My Big Heart; Some people see having a big heart as a fault... I am not one of those folks. To me, having a big heart means you care and if you care then you believe in something and if you believe in something you stand for something; standing for something (as the saying goes) keeps you from falling for everything.
6. My Low Tolerance to BullShit; From a young age I have had a low tolerance to Bull Shit. My mother recalls times where I called out a bully for cheating on a game when I was only in the young classes of primary school... I then refused to back down and got myself into trouble for fighting but the sentiment was right.
7. My Ability to Let It Go; That Elsa one has a point and although I may fail at times, I try to follow her advice. Letting things go is a therapuetic process that helps you heal, learn and possibly help in the future.
8. My Sense of Humour; I used to always think I was goofy and silly and no one would ever think I was cool. Then I arrived in College in my purple jeans and grey knee high boots (They were pretty cool back then) and made my first Girl Gang Friend For Life who thought I was the funniest Bish she ever did meet. Delighted to say we are friends almost 10 years and although we may ebb and flow depending on our current situations; Girl always Got my Back!! ;)
9. My Boobs; They grown and changed and have a few stretch marks now but years ago I would have given ANYTHING on this planet to chop them off. Then I realised how much other girls would adore to have them and I got real; real quick and started to appreciate everything I had and now I think the girls are just ace.
10. Last but not least; My Feet... I have tiny size 4.5 feet that curl slightly upwards at the toes from so many years of Irish Dancing. I love the attention they get for being so tiny and dainty and they carry me around with my wild ideas everyday. I can tattoo them, Paint them, Massage them and my favourite thing to do is walk through the water and feel the waves and sand wash over them.
So there are my 10 favourite things about myself, What are yours? I hope you love them for the right reason.... which is.... ANY DAMN REASON YOU WANT!!! Your Life, Your Rules, Your Favourite Bits. Do not, under any circumstances allow another human to make you feel like you don't deserve to have something. If you have it; you deserve it. Hate breeds hate and everyone gets their 15 minutes if thats what they desire; their true intentions always come out in the wash. I'm not perfect but I'm full of love for this world and the people in it. If someone disagrees with me, that's fine, it is there opinion. I'm going to preach my message regardless.
Self Love is whatever Love you choose to give yourself! No one can tell you how, when or why to do it; you do what you need at the time you need it.
Love and Light,
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I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!