Now you may be thinking that the general adult population should have the Cop On to know that Facebook is not something that is genuinely straight forward... ... however... you would be wrong!
Granted, people don't take photographic social media (think Instagram and Pintrest) so seriously, but, unfortunately this type of logic does not translate across the board.
It is for this reason I decided to have a little rant; I hope you find it humorous, informative and relateable as I endeavor to continue to tell it like it is. Mucho Love Amigas & Amigos! :)
1. Likers & Haters
When someone posts a nice photo to Facebook be aware of a few things; usually it's because they need a pick me up, they feel shitty and would really appreciate a little compliment... Others want to gloat - but let's face it; we are all prone to a bit of a gloat so how bout we just cut everyone a bit of slack and just super simplify it!!!
If it's a nice picture; like it, if it's not; don't.
No need to over analyse it or show 10 people and make assumptions on someone's life or character - it's a fucking photo(head in hands!) - PLEASE Get a Grip of Your Life.
2. "Check-In" to The Land of Jealousy
If a person checks-in at a nice place, you would be the biggest fool to assume the following;
A) That they paid full price and must be loaded - bitch please!
B) That they're having a right time in their life.
Being jealous of someone or begrudging them their life says a lot more about you than them. We have all been guilty of it, even myself at times. However, when I catch myself doing this I have a serious talk with myself and I remember that I wouldn't want to be judged in that way so I don't judge others in that way and I go and do something worth while with my day - like living it.
3. A Facebook identity does not a bad (or good) person (or relationship) make.
People don't usually put the nice things they do everyday on Facebook. If they do, it may not be because they want attention or want people to comment underneath (although there are those people also), it may be to prove a point to judgmental individuals that not everything we do in life goes up on Facebook,
If you need to see that someone checks into a hospital or charitable organisation in order to think highly of them, then my dear, you need to seriously COP yourself ON!
4. Fantasy is not real, Facebook is!
Facebook is full of REAL people - it's not just a bitta craic on the internet. Anything you put on the net (aside from satirical humour obviously) has the possibility to offend and hurt people. Commenting nasty shit under people's photos is cruel - not funny; messaging strangers when you have a partner is still chatting them up even if it's on a computer - not fantasy; being horrible to a person online because you don't have the guts to say it to their face makes you a coward - not cool.
So realize that what you say will be taken seriously because this IS reality, and the people are real so if you wouldn't like someone to say ot to or about you or your sister or your brother then don't say it, because everyone is someones daughter, son, sister or brother and it could be you at the brunt of the joke one day or who's partner is flirting with other people online and you have to pick up the pieces - it won't be so trivial then let me tell ya, it ain't rocket science folks.
5. Instead of Judging - Hold Them Horses!
We all come into this world the same way and we will all leave this world the same way. I'm sorry to tell ya; but you're no more special than anyone else on the planet. We are ALL equal. So remove your ass from that High Horse and come on down to the rest of us here.
As in life; everyone page is completely under their control. If they "like and share photos of sick children that need a million likes to be saved" that is THEIR business. You don't think it's realistic? That's nice... but it keeps them thinking in a charitable way so even if it is 'click bait', I bet they will still like and share those posts long after you've moved on to judging somebody else entirely.
6. Know what your ACTUAL business is.
If someone shares something you don't like, agree with or think is relevant to your life... Guess what!?
No one GIVES a shit. Just click 'hide' on their posts and continue your day. If it annoys you and you feel you need to comment on it or start an argument or be in any way smug then honey I would severely urge the following:
Stop projecting your own miserable life and the things that upset you onto others. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion; even if it's old fashioned, even if it's sexist/racist or completely ludicrous (America has a president for that), the measure of a human is how they live their own life. You will NEVER change anyone's mind by the amount of talking or typing under their statuses that you do.
They must change themselves or they never will.
When is the last time you heard someone say "I was so enlightened by that persons argument on my Facebook status that I decided to change my whole thinking!" ... Yeah, me neither.
7. An awful lot of it is Bullshit!
"Having a great time drinking Champagne in a Posh Place".
A bottle of Prosecco costs €25-€30 in any bar usually; same as a bottle of wine, if not cheaper in some places. Now factor in the fact that you can get 4-5 drinks from it leaving it the same price as a pint of Cider or Lager. However, the photo looks nicer doesn't it?
So why get your knickers in a twist? Perhaps it was bought especially to have a nice photo in the memories on Facebook so all in your friends list could think a fabulous time was being had when in reality;
* You've not eaten all day because you were running around attempting to find an expensive looking present with your €15 and 27 cent.
* Your NCT is due;
* You're broke as shit;
These would be reasons to stay at home except for the judgement! Oh Lord God on High; The Judgement!
The judgement of not showing up to YET ANOTHER birthday party due to your money situation would feel a lot worse than what being in debt does.
And other times (I've had to do this myself!), due to severe lack of fund but not being able to miss a birthday, I've driven to parties to give myself an excuse not to have to pend money on drinks so that I may have half a chance of staying a float financially that week.
Of course it's a silly reasoning but I hear it constantly from men and women of all ages and I've been guilty of it myself too. Guilt can make you put yourself in ridiculous situations that could easily be avoided if people (just like you reading this) were'nt so judgemental.
So don't be so swift to cast judgement as it really is ALL Bullshit!
8. Quiet a bit of it is there for someone else's benefit.
Be aware that not all is as it seems; someone who may make a fabulous Facebook parent could be M.I.A. in real life, so be aware of the fact that if someone doesn't plaster photos of their kids all over Facebook it doesn't necessarily mean they're a bad parent or they don't care. Perhaps (Shock, Horror) Fakebook is just not their jam!
As per all the points; we are all very different human beings and there is no need for us to be identical once we are good creatures.
Posts may be there to attract potential customers or followers to a business, page or idea. For this reason; thinking every time someone posts a 'selfie' looking nice, with make up on or wearing a nice outfit, that they must be out partying is very naiive.
So hows about, you endeavor to cop yourself on a little bit and stop assuming everything because you're making an ass out of yourself and all of us while you're at it.
Filters are there for a reason - to "rose-tint" the truth. Be aware of this and try not to be so dim about the fact that everyone has problems not just you and you will actually manifest even bigger issues for yourself if you consistently compare, talk or snoop on other people.
9. They're online now - Why haven't they replied to my message!?
Get a fucking grip would you please, you are NOT the only person on the planet and you DO NOT take precedence over someone else's life. Therefore, an idea would be to wait your turn and be grateful that person got back to you at all (even if it took a week).
There was time before online tell tailing when we could take our time to reply to letters or return phone calls, now you're met with the Spanish Inquest each time you open and don't respond straight away or worse save it, until a time you can read it fully and respond in depth, and then have a little mosey online and get caught rotten.
If you want a faster respone time? Pick up the actual phone and make an actual phone call to them!
Strangely this is not a new concept.
10. Send a blooming message.
Facebook reminding you of someone's birthday does NOT make you a great person in the same way that someone NOT posting on your wall for your birthday does not make THEM a bad person.
Yes there is always the possibility that they intentionally haven't posted but they also may not have gone into the notifications and/or they may have missed it on Facebook.
Either way be kind to eachother, if someone forgets your birthday; are you actually going to care? If you do, then seriously you need to get a life!
Because your birthday doesn't actually matter to anyone bar yourself, your parents and the Revenue Commissioners.
Make a big deal about it all you want, but you'll have one again next year, like clock work, right around the same time. Get over it! You're welcome!
Wondering how someone is? Send a message!
Wondering why someone never came to you when they were suffering with depression but were always online? Sometimes it's easier to mindlessly wander than to actually talk about their problems or fears and it can also, by the same token, could simply be that they do not want to burden anyone else with their shit.
If you know someone who may be having a tough time, ignore the happy pictures they put on Facebook and CHECK ON THEM!!!
Say hello from time to time, ask how they are?, yes they may think you are or up to something (that's the sad part about life now, we must have a motive to do something nice).
A lot of my friends and family have to spend 5 minutes assuring me that they are really fine before I leave them alone about it because I need to feel secure that I've asked some of the people I love if they're OK and if I can help.
YOU can help (or even save) ANYONE, but TOGETHER, we can all mind eachother, you'd just need to take your head out of your shopping bags occasionally.
I hope you enjoyed reading this and had a little giggle, perhaps got a lump in your throat and a bit of perspective over Facebook and Life. Be conscious not to over simplify things sometimes and realize you don't own all the problems in the world so why not cut someone else a bit of slack every now and again. I'm certain you'll end up surprising yourself and even understanding people a lot better, and be understood in return.
If you think that this blog post would be helpful to someone else you know or found it funny, accurate or helpful; please support me by sharing my website on social media, I would be delighted.
Until Next Time,
Light, Love, Live,
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I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!